Strange world

[davidn]

I had one of my oddest experiences in recent memory today - just the combination of a lot of things in quick succession. I had been particularly proud of something at work, a task involving HTTP authentication that I thought would be a huge pain but that I'd managed to solve that morning (a great reminder of why I enjoy the work I do), so I went for a walk in the afternoon and went into the Dunkin Donuts - a place that I rarely venture even though there's one on every street corner here, mostly because if I allowed myself to become fully aware of its availability I would be wider than I am tall before too long.

As I came in the first door of the sort of airlock arrangement, I saw two young women approaching from inside, and pulled the inner door open for them, stepping out of the way to give them and their massive trays of coffee enough room to get out. The first thing I heard out of the leading girl's mouth as she passed was "That was, like, so unnecessary" - and I promise that this is not me editorializing to draw attention to the extraordinarily irritating way in which Americans talk, those were the exact words she said. To her credit, I think - though I'm not entirely sure - that she was talking to her friend, the tail end of a conversation that I'd missed, rather than talking about me holding the door. I hope so.

Anyway, after I'd punched her in the kidneys I continued into the building. The next thing to happen was one that's rather difficult to replicate in text form, but I'll do my best - I had only just approached the counter when the man behind it addressed me with the greeting "Hey! [At this point attempt to imagine a large man with dreadlocks doing a sort of Revolver Ocelot twirling display with his hands, ending with them both pointing at me] Nice coat!" The compliment was appreciated, but I was just a little taken aback by how flamboyantly he had announced it.

Then, after I'd selected a couple of toroidal confectioneries, the woman who had been picking them out stabbed at the till and announced an insignificant sum of something like $1.34 to me. I looked in my wallet and only had a $20, so I took it out and asked her "Is a twenty okay?" in a sort of half-apology. That's what you do, isn't it, when you've got a comically large denomination compared to the price you're going to pay and are therefore robbing their cash register of a vast amount of their change? Well, she didn't seem to think so - she burst out laughing.

When I was away in Internet-land during October, people expressed sincere doubt that I had ever been in a McDonald's or more generally any sort of fast food place. Today I sort of understood why, as this is the most alien I've felt for a very long time.

Comments

[xaq.livejournal.com]

You're not the only one catching the odd parts of conversations today. Partway through screening a flight today, I heard the following spoken into a cell phone:

"Nah, pretty boring up here. .. ...Nope, no vampires, no aliens, nothing."


As for the last bit, sometimes folks just have a really crappy day at work, and little things like that will be just the thing to make their day. You were probably just what she needed at that point in the shift.

[(Anonymous)]

(Drake Wilson, posting unauthenticated until he can get his OpenID back up at his new domain…)

A twenty is not a comically large cash denomination anywhere I've been in the US, even for small transactions. Most of the split that I've seen here is between accepting only up to twenties and accepting up to hundreds; the latter tends to happen at larger and more general-purpose shops, whereas the former is common at restaurants and some smaller commercial venues. Not accepting a twenty would be surprising; businesses are expected to just deal with whatever shuffling is necessary to repeatedly give change, though if they're running low they might apologetically ask if you have anything smaller. If the total has a low number of cents modulo one dollar, they might also ask if you have suitable coinage, though purportedly this is more to relieve you of the inconvenience of carting around piles of pennies and nickels in your pocket, considering the very customer-biased nature of most in-person commercial interactions in the US.

Now, if you'd gotten out a hundred-dollar bill, the question might well have been answered “no”. :-P

She was probably glad you didn't try to pay with American Express!

[davidn]

It happened at an Au Bon Pain at an airport a year ago as well, but I could see that one as justified because unable to fully identify what I'd grabbed, I'd said "I'd like this weird folded-over sandwich and this sort of biscuit-y thing, please". I'm glad to provide moments like that, though at the same time I often can't help but feel that the Americans treat the British as sort of pet people to amuse themselves.

I'd like to know what his image of an exciting - or even normal! - time is :)

[davidn]

I suppose a $20 is... less than I mentally picture it - if you pay for a very small purchase with a £20 in Scotland, then the best you can expect is a punch in the face. Then the balls. But if you've got a £50 then you're absolutely out of luck, as absolutely nobody seems to accept those (and similarly, if you're trying to use Scottish banknotes in England, then you're always going to have problems.)

[(Anonymous)]

Keep in mind that this is a country in which we still regularly send out personal cheques to pay bills, and in which one is told that one has to get on the credit card treadmill early on or else be denied loans later in life for not having a credit history. The elements of finance in the US are bizarre in all sorts of amusing and terrible ways, so really no pattern of acceptance or lack thereof for bank notes should come as a surprise exactly.

Also, 20 GBP is a little over 30 USD, not that that necessarily matters. :-) US twenties are sort of at the edge, as I mentioned, but they're also (for instance) the only denomination most cash machines will give out (as you may have noticed), so I imagine that tends to push the suspicion/inconvenience threshold above that amount.

So what do you do in Scotland if you have a ₤50 note and want to purchase a packet of crisps or something?

Actually, now that I think of it, at one point I went to purchase some coffee and pastry at my favorite local coffeeshop, and I absentmindedly and rather embarrassingly handed the cashier what I thought was a twenty only to receive a startling amount of change back and find out that I'd given her a hundred and she'd processed it without blinking. So that might say something.

[davidn]

Oh, the whole credit rating thing, and how the television and Internet seem determined to make you afraid of these three numbers, was absolutely baffling to me - and still is. When we tried to start the process of house buying, there were concerns because I didn't have any score at all, until we found that a spouse's score transfers to you in Massachusetts. It appears, paradoxically, that you need to have been in a certain amount of debt before you qualify to accrue any more.

So what do you do in Scotland if you have a ₤50 note and want to purchase a packet of crisps or something?

Well, you're pretty much stuffed. Not that I think I've ever actually seen a £50 note - cashpoints will usually give out £10s, with £20s being quite rare and large, and £50 feels like it's too big to be practical. (I managed to accidentally work this to my advantage when I was a student, a couple of times, finding that if you presented bus drivers with a £20 they would usually sigh and tell you to "just get on".)

My brother was talking (in his odd way) about having "a couple of Benjamins" when he was visiting, and was absolutely fascinated when I had one in my pocket - it is... nice, from the customer's point of view, that notes of much higher value have some practical use here.

Also, I haven't mentioned how much I love the treasure-chest-like weight and appearance of the £1 and £2 coins, but I feel I should.