A journal post?!

[davidn]

I've mentioned before that I seem to have a high susceptibility to picking up habits from things if I'm around them too long, but about a month after finishing Metal Gear Solid 4 I've begun to realize I've picked up the most irritating one yet from it.

It's a hallmark of Hideo Kojima's writing style - and something that's completely excruciating whenever it comes up after you've noticed it once - that he breaks up lines that go on for a long time (which is most of them) by making one character repeat the last line with a question mark on the end (demonstrative video). He says he does this because the player can't rewind cutscenes and needs important points hammered into their heads, but why he doesn't solve this by the more obvious mechanism of making cutscenes rewindable is beyond everyone.

And I've heard myself starting to do this in just about any interjection or to prompt someone to continue speaking - but I notice it every time just after I've said it. I've started to have to pause for a couple of seconds to mentally rephrase what I'm going to say so that it doesn't take the form of a parroted question - I hope I get out of it before too long.

Comments

[davidn]

Post comment?!

[ravenworks.livejournal.com]

... *acts like there was some other reason for him heading to the comments field*

[davidn]

Yes, I had anticipated that :)

[ravenworks.livejournal.com]

The same sort of thing tends to happen to me, but thankfully it usually wears itself out in my head long before I ever have a chance to use it out loud..

[kjorteo]

Sometimes I find that can be a useful way to break it up a little when one of my characters starts getting dangerously close to monologuing, but... it has to be used extremely sparingly!

[kjorteo]

Monologuing?!
Used sparingly?!

[davidn]

It is a device I see quite often, but it can be done well or badly no matter whether it's done with parroting the last few words or just by having little interjections to break up a sentence that's getting dangerously near ten words (The Matrix Reloaded immediately comes to my mind as something that was gratingly full of the second variety).

It's when I find myself mentally slipping into David Hayter's voice as I read that it's clearly a problem - and I haven't reached anywhere near that point yet with anything you've written :)

[kjorteo]

That is more than likely because I try and add some substance to the interjections. Even if I just break up an overly long "Blah blah blah subject A, oh, and while I'm thinking about it, subject B too" speech with something like "Blah blah blah subject A"/"I see, but what about subject B?"/"FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK", at least even that is something more than just having the recipient of the monologue randomly parrot certain words back at the speaker. :)

("Subject A?!")