Oh if only UK was not so far
Dec. 28th, 2009 09:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
davidnDear Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab:
You bastard. I mean, I can plainly see why countries might not like America all that much thanks to the exportation of McDonalds and the existence of Paris Hilton, among other things, but speaking only for myself here, did you really have to try to blow up a plane headed there when I was about to have to make the same UK to US journey? Why couldn't you stick to scamming people out of their money like the rest of the country? It always happens when I need to get back from somewhere - suddenly a no-liquids rule on the way back from the honeymoon, reduced luggage and hours of extra security checks at Heathrow this afternoon. In two years, no hand luggage, no clothing and no smiling.
Because of your failure to do anything but set your own leg on fire, we sat watching the hours go by at Heathrow while a cluster of people were molested one by one by a security team, before they all moved over a gate and gave us the privelege as well (not having the wherewithal or resources to actually start before the flights were due to leave). Have you any idea what it's like trying to explain the contents of your case to an elderly Indian man while having your intimate areas grabbed by his partner? "That's a dynamo torch, I didn't know what it was either when I unwrapped it, you wind it up with the handle". "It's a DS, you know, the... portable game thing, it opens sort of like a laptop, like this...". "It's a DVD drive, I keep it out of my computer because I fruitlessly hope that putting in the second battery gives it more than a minute more lifespan." Having a book called Why We Suck probably wasn't the best choice either when they were looking for people who don't like America. But my brother-in-law was only travelling within the US, and they didn't allow him to have so much as a book out, giving the passengers six hours of mind-numbing blankness (or some respite if they turned the seat-back TVs off). I didn't think I could enjoy flying any less, but you have shown me new levels of unbearability.
I wish upon you two hundred delayed non-stop flights to Australia, with your legacy of increased security measures, in economy class, between two people who have eaten exclusively at McDonalds for the last fifteen years and behind one of those people who catapults their seat into the fully reclined position and leaves it there for the duration of the flight.
Bye.
You bastard. I mean, I can plainly see why countries might not like America all that much thanks to the exportation of McDonalds and the existence of Paris Hilton, among other things, but speaking only for myself here, did you really have to try to blow up a plane headed there when I was about to have to make the same UK to US journey? Why couldn't you stick to scamming people out of their money like the rest of the country? It always happens when I need to get back from somewhere - suddenly a no-liquids rule on the way back from the honeymoon, reduced luggage and hours of extra security checks at Heathrow this afternoon. In two years, no hand luggage, no clothing and no smiling.
Because of your failure to do anything but set your own leg on fire, we sat watching the hours go by at Heathrow while a cluster of people were molested one by one by a security team, before they all moved over a gate and gave us the privelege as well (not having the wherewithal or resources to actually start before the flights were due to leave). Have you any idea what it's like trying to explain the contents of your case to an elderly Indian man while having your intimate areas grabbed by his partner? "That's a dynamo torch, I didn't know what it was either when I unwrapped it, you wind it up with the handle". "It's a DS, you know, the... portable game thing, it opens sort of like a laptop, like this...". "It's a DVD drive, I keep it out of my computer because I fruitlessly hope that putting in the second battery gives it more than a minute more lifespan." Having a book called Why We Suck probably wasn't the best choice either when they were looking for people who don't like America. But my brother-in-law was only travelling within the US, and they didn't allow him to have so much as a book out, giving the passengers six hours of mind-numbing blankness (or some respite if they turned the seat-back TVs off). I didn't think I could enjoy flying any less, but you have shown me new levels of unbearability.
I wish upon you two hundred delayed non-stop flights to Australia, with your legacy of increased security measures, in economy class, between two people who have eaten exclusively at McDonalds for the last fifteen years and behind one of those people who catapults their seat into the fully reclined position and leaves it there for the duration of the flight.
Bye.
no subject
Date: 2009-12-29 11:58 am (UTC)We were with BA and the flight was very normal once it had taken off - no extra confined-to-seat time, no restrictions on getting to hand luggage or seat back pocket things. And I should hope so, seeing as they pull your whole bag to pieces before you get on. The in-flight entertainment took a couple of goes to get started, but it was there, and I'd thought it was because of their technical problems that the flight map wasn't there... it hadn't actually occurred to me that it might be unavailable for other reasons.
I would hope that the heightened security will calm down in a few weeks, because if they continue at their current rate then they'll still be boarding flights that were meant to leave this Friday by that point.
Good luck!
no subject
Date: 2009-12-29 01:51 pm (UTC)The sky map part of the IFE has apparently been banned as it would show the position of the plane. But then again, all you need is to google "great circle mapper" and take a watch and you'll have a pretty good idea of when you're in US airspace. Which makes the banning of the map look rather stupid.
The entertainment always breaks down anyway. The map broke on an AA flight a while back. As one the cabin crew was walking past, I asked if there was any chance of it being fixed. Her response was "Ha! This whole plane is falling to bits....oh oh oh, I mean the entertainment system".
no subject
Date: 2009-12-29 05:06 pm (UTC)Apparently a lot of the madder knee-jerk rules are already being relaxed, so I would hold out hope for a bearable flight. I'm not sure whether the gate check will still be in place, though, and it seems... pointless that they only started for us after our flight was meant to board rather than early enough to get our flight out on time.
As for the map, I think my preferred method to see if we were landing would be to look out of the window!